Posts tagged subjectivity
Distasteful dialogue
I've been really blessed to have had so many great reviews for my books over the past few months - lots of "5"s and so many great comments. But last week I got a couple of reviews that were just okay.

And that's okay. We all know this business is subjective and not everyone will like everything I write. I've heard all the advice from other authors about having a thick skin and ignoring the bad reviews unless you can learn from them.

So normally I wouldn't even comment about them (and just to be clear, these aren't BAD reviews - they were both 3 1/2 stars) but one reviewer did make a comment about my book Irish Sex Fairy that stuck in my head and made me  have another look at my story. She said  "There were a few times during the explicit sex scenes where I found the dialogue slightly distasteful..."

Distasteful?

Distasteful, according to Dictionary.com means "unpleasant, offensive, or causing dislike".

I don't know why that particular word bothers me so much. I fully know that many of my books would definitely be "distasteful" to some people who don't want to read explicit sex scenes or stories about threesomes or BDSM. So I reread every sex scene in Irish Sex Fairy, trying to see where she was coming from, keeping in mind she'd said it was the dialogue that was distasteful. Not the things they were doing. Because yes, they do have sex, and yes it's pretty hot - and yet it wasn't that she found distasteful - it was what they were saying.

But of course, it's subjective...right? Because I don't see any of the dialogue as unpleasant or offensive. Certainly no more offensive there than in any other point in the story. But she did.

I just have to get over it, it's just one more lesson on how everyone sees things differently. But..but..wait! Not everyone likes my stories? Really? Oh my god! And I'm distasteful...no, wait, my dialogue was distasteful, not me...it's hard to separate my writing from myself.  I clearly still have a lot of toughening up to do.